Merge pull request !26556 from lilei/modify_parallel_API_note

Robin-hood-hashing (https://github.com/martinus/robin-hood-hashing)
is considered faster then std::unordered_map/set,
so we use it to improve mindspore performance.

1. robin_hood head file in `third_party/robin_hood/include`;
2. In `utils/hash_map.h` and `utils/hash_set.h`, we define:
 - mindspore::HashMap as an alias of robin_hood::unordered_map;
 - mindspore::HashSet as an alias of robin_hood::unordered_set;
3. Replace:
 - `#include <unordered_map>` --> `#include "utils/hash_map.h"`;
 - `#include <unordered_set>` --> `#include "utils/hash_set.h"`;
 - `std::unordered_map` --> `mindspore::HashMap`;
 - `std::unordered_set` --> `mindspore::HashSet`;
 - `map.insert(std::pair(key, value))` --> `map.emplace(key, value)`;
 - `[] (const std::pair<K, V> &p) {..} ` --> `[] (const auto &p) {..} `;
4. Fix issues found by switch to robin_hood:
 - AnfNodeConfig hash and equal;
 - Fix a bug in `Slice::operator==()`;
 - Fix a bug in `CNode::HasPrimalAttr()`;
 - Fix map.erase() usage bugs: `map.erase(iter++)` --> `iter = map.erase(iter)`;
 - Fix some iterator invalidated problem;
5. Some std::unordered_map/set can not replace by robin_hood:
 - As parameter of functions that exposed to python by pybind11;
 - Use bad hash that cause robin_hood::map over_flow, such as AbstractBasePtrListHasher;
6. Update cpp unit tests;
7. Add build option '-F' to enable robin_hood, default on.

Signed-off-by: zhoufeng <zhoufeng54@huawei.com>